a quick one before the two kahunas fly off to honolulu 030409

Vince says:

The past two days have seen the two of us waking up pretty early. What is pretty early in Hawaii? Well, pretty early is about 7 to 8AM. Usually activities from the night before and daily drinking (on my part) of Jagermeister (yes hanrong i'm already polishing off my second bottle) puts me in bed till about 9 to 10AM. Indecent attitudes to spending a good full day on Hawaii don't you think? Well, thats life in paradise folks - you get to sleep in EVERY DAY. HAHA.

Yesterday we woke up early cuz Uncle Paul has a golf tournament an hour's drive away, at this golf community called Hokolea. (Isn't that quite the concept - its just a bunch of rich people building houses with a killer view of the ocean and having exclusive use of a golf course - you don't get THAT in Singapore!) Fun took some pictures and I took some videos (again I'll be editing videos once I reach Singapore, so none at the moment). It was a magnificent view of the ocean, and Dad, if you're reading this, the championship hole was too beautiful for words. They play upslope though, its crazy hard hence.


Before we went on to our next destination, we stopped by a macademia nut mill. Singapore cannot grow macademia nuts because our climate is just the pits, but in Hawaii, again - where paradise is paradise - it is done. I bought a bag of Mac nuts dipped in chocolate (which melted in the car when I left it there unfortunately - sigh...).

Then Aunt Yen Yee brought us to Kealakekua Bay, a historical park located just a 30-minute winding drive away. This bay is infamous for being the 'deathplace' of Captain Cook, the famous British explorer whom founded some parts of Australia before being brutally skinned and decapitated by Hawaiian savages. This cliff face you see here hides his bones (and many other kapu-breakers (offenders)) as well.

We then went to the Painted Church which is the prettiest thing of all! I know what you're thinking - Vincent going to a church? But this Catholic church was lovingly hand-painted by their priest, and he painted all over the walls and ceilings and it was just beautiful. How could I say no to a work of art which was a labour of love? I signed in their guest book with the comment: "Peace in a sanctuary of peace" which was really what I felt when I was in there.

The City Of Refuge was our next stop. Imagine this scene - you have just broken a kapu (Hawaiian word for decree) - which by the way, ranges from the stupidest things like letting your shadow fall on a upper class shadow; walking where the king had walked; walking on a trail meant for another class - honestly, you'd think they barely stepped out of their tents. Anyway back to the breaking kapu thing - so when you broke a kapu, you die. Theres no ifs or buts. You die. Stoned; skinned; eaten alive. You have one chance of survival - make it to the City Of Refuge. If you do make it (many don't), a high priest will hear your sin and forgive you and all will be right with the Gods and you can safely return to your village where you can exact revenge on those who held the stones against you. I'm kidding on the last part, but hey, if thats what happened to me, I'd kick my enemies' asses. Anywho, the City of Refuge is now this nice heritage site which people visit because its significant to the indigenous culture there. Pictures below, and also, as you can see, we got a little bit carried away with looking at the tidepools which formed in the lava rocks beside the ocean.



Aunt Yen Yee then drove us to the Coffee Shack which is just the most quaint coffee shop! I had the most filling and delicious lunch - a giant (actually pretty normal with American-sized standards) Beef Pastrami sandwich - imagine layers upon layers of ham squeezed together between two toasted homemade breads with onions and other delightful ingredients! Ian was just seething with jealousy. Too bad for him, ha!

We stopped by the town of Kainaliu where I checked out this cool beans Ukelele shop (the cute small version of the guitar which I absolutely must get before I leave) and played some of their US$500 ukes. Now thats just insane. I chatted with the shop owner as well and she let me handle the uber-expensive ukes and play a couple of chords on them.

The next shop I went just floored me. I noticed this store on the second storey which stated that it sold records. So I was like, oh cool maybe I'd find some cool vinyl. So I get there, and I walk in, and its just this Rastafari shop selling everything Bob Marley and marijuana posters and distributing pamphlets calling for the case against the banning of weed. Then I walked into the shop a little bit more and I saw the bongs. There they were! BONGS. Big ones, little ones, pipe ones, staring at it, I just flipped out. The owner of the store came out and he put on this reggae record on his Stanton turntable and looked totally hippie-ish. I immediately made my acquaintance and chatted with him. We talked a bit about marijuana and how to smoke weed, and by the end of the day I asked him the all-important question: where to find some good herb. He looked at me with creased brows and said "Oh its completely illegal here BUT..." and proceeded to tell me where I could get it.

I was just overwhelmed at this point. Logan (the owner) told me that I could probably score it from some pharmacy located just down the road, or if I was gonna be in town and by any beaches, approach anyone that looks like they're holding and in his words: 'just ask em'. He proceeded to say that Hawaii's the second best place to smoke it up because its like, the second largest producer of this fine agriculture. He was also dumbfounded when I said I had never tried it in my life. He was like "whuuuuut?!" and then understood when I told him that where I came from, cannabis is banned man. And anyone who did it took a shit in the hangman's noose. We shook hands and I thanked him for his time and I stepped out of The Weed Zone.

I never did go to that pharmacy. We had to pick up Uncle Paul from his golf game and we drove home after that.

That night we went over to another neighbour's place, John who lived just next door. His house is this super cool installation art concept which embraced the universe; seas; and the land they were on. Imagine living in an installation art that told of the universe and you've got John's house. He also had a pool table which materialized from the ceiling (like it would be brought down from the ceiling) and an underground basement dungeon which was his cellar. And that cellar is mighty stellar. The centre of his house was this saltwater aquarium which he pumped saltwater directly from the ocean from 80 feet away to keep his fishes healthy. And in his cellar dungeon (wine cellar, by the way, wine kept since 1984 - I sneaked a peek at those rare vintage vino) there was a solid clear glass which you could look at the underwater aquarium. Imagine having your own Underwater World in your house. With vintage wine. Oh and did I mention, he has a Steinway and Sons grand piano. It probably cost only, oh about US$100,000. Nothing much. Not as much compared to the rest of his beautiful beautiful house. Oh my god. I would kill to live out the rest of my life there. He has his own observatory which is accessed through a spiral staircase to the second floor of his house, where he keeps his telescopes. He has a moondial and sundial. Oh the ceiling has a hole where once every summer solstice, for about three days, sunlight shines directly through that hole and into the cellar underground. Now that's spectacular. Hopefully we'll get permission to take photos next time.

Today we went out paddling again. We didn't see ANYTHING. Not a single dolphin or whale. Ugh. But we did, on our way back, see a bunch of lovely caucasian females about our age in bikinis soaking in the hot tub. Well, what do you do in that situation? Go into the hot tub with them, thats what. We did not make small talk though. We asian boys were just too shy. That is our greatest folly. So don't worry my lovely ladies back home, I'm still available.

Then I drove us both to another religous historical site - a heiau. A Heiau is a place where Hawaiians offer their respects and pray to the gods for good weather; good anything. I won't go into the history, but it was mighty impressive. Unfortunately it was bloody closed. We could not go into the temple itself. I drove 45 minutes to not be able to see anything. Oh and at the nearby Shark's Bay I thought I saw sharks, but Ian said it wasn't. I'm right though, I know that.

Then Ian (fat) got hungry and we decided to go get something to eat. I drove up some REALLY beautiful highway scenery for another hour before we got to the town of Hawi where we had mexican food. The burritos were HUGE man! Ian couldn't finish his - thats saying something. AND I found another Rastafari shop which also sold bongs! This time I didn't leave empty handed. I bought something which I will show you guys back home. Its too sensitive to announce publicly - sshhh.

Driving back I kept stopping to just admire the beautiful scenery. Then Ian had a brainwave to check out the Hilton hotel, which he says is just stupendously beautiful. So we did. We parked, walked across the road and crashed the hotel premises.

If anyone should live in just one hotel all his life, the Hilton Waikaloa Village is the one to live in. You've probably heard of it, or not, but I was just wiki-ing some trivia - it costs about a third of a billion dollars, and 1,300 staff to maintain this premises. I walk in, and its just... WOW. Just WOW. The hotel is so big they have their own bloody MONORAIL to take its guests anywhere. They have their own dolphin sanctuary for anyone willing to spend a cool US$200 to swim and take pictures and touch. They have their own private (BEAUTIFUL) manmade beach IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HOTEL. They have a river with free boat rides IN THE HOTEL. They have CUTE GIRLS. They also have the finest facilities of any hotel I'VE EVER SEEN. I read that this Hilton hotel is their premier hotel of their chain - and IT SHOWS. If you're a mass tourist looking for a fantasy gateaway, spend a night here. Oh and one night costs about S$700 for a room, and lets not go into the suites. Ian has some photos as well.

Tomorrow we'll be flying off to Honolulu, and spend some quality time shopping. Wow how terribly interesting. Anyway you cool cats will see us at best three days from now, and take care folks back home! Our thoughts are with you, even if most of the time they're on cute white chicks and beautiful Hawaiian scenery. Lovely.